Part Two:
The second time I visit N, S and the girls I had been invited to an EID fest--a fest celebrating the end of Ramadan...a "sweet" fest! Monika had lent me her traditional Pakistani dress which she had received several years before from a family for whom she was a German tutor. A and R were so excited that we were all in pink!!
From 8pm till 12am we played UNO, danced, sang, ate, talked, drew pictures, and experimented with Henna! It was a beautiful time together and I sit in awe of how they have just adopted me into their family...so simply...so quickly. I was so happy to get that time with N, especially. Of course, it was great to talk to S and I also got to meet one of her best friends, Lily, who is the only other person who is ever actually invited to their apartment. Lily is a canadian woman of German descent who lived in America before marrying an Austrian and moving to Vienna. She has been here for 9 years and is a teacher--in fact, that is where she and S met! She was S's teacher when S was learning English and they became instant friends! And acutally, it was Lily who was there at S's side being with her and helping her throughout the pregnancy and birth of Irena! It was lovely to get to know this other soul so dear to my new friends!
R was anxious to teach me all about Islam and Islamic prayer--she showed me the two prayer books they have and how they say their prayers, how the read the Qu'ran (always with their head covered, with the book rested on a pillow in their lap, and making sure never to turn your back or your feet to the book because it is not just a book but the holy word of Allah which is to be revered). What was so beautiful to me was the respect the two girls have for their religion and to see it also through their young eyes--they explained every little aspect to me in their own way of understanding it! They explained that they show so much respect to the Qu'ran because "it is as if there was a king sitting in the room with us!"
Then N came from the kitchen and started to explain more to me about the prayer five times a day, when they have to pray, what it sounds like, etc. She told me aout her life (the life she LOVED) back in Pakistan where she was a talented and acclaimed teacher of English, Math, and General Studies to children in the local school. She could keep a beautiful and convenient prayer rhythm (not that I could ever be convinced that praying at 5am every morning could ever be convenient!) and everything in life was more in order and she was a successful woman and mother. All this led me to ask...."Then why did you come to Vienna?! Why did you leave it all?" To which she just smiled and shook her head at me--which I have come to learn in only two visits that it means either 1. the girls are around and we don't talk about these things in front of them because instead of being dishonest or superficial or sugar-coating things for the girls, we teach them to respect privacy and honesty and we respect their innocence and our responsibility to protect them, or 2. it is not that time in our friendship to share these intimate things. ....So we moved on...
There is so much mystery as of yet in N's story. But it is a beautiful witness to see the distance and mystery that is important in friendship. She is so open, loving, genuine, and welcoming, already showing such delight in spending time together, but friendship with another doesn't exclude privacy and distance. In fact, Father Jacques has said that many times--that friendship truly requires a distance because you are not the fulfillment for the other person---only God is. It keeps your friendship from being exclusive, but instead, open and fruitful.
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| A "henna-ing" one of my hands |
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| R "henna-ing" my hand |
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| N and me |
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| R |
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| Lily and :I: |
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