Since I was little, my mom had me reading books about the lives of the saints. I remember the first time I read the story of St. Maria Goretti-I was so intrigued, I asked so many questions, I was inspired to have a love for God as she did, a courage that endured all opposition. In University the example of St. Therese of Lisieux and her 'Little Way' became very special to me, a handbook for how to live even the most ordinary life, a college student's life all for love of God and love for those around you, simply, quietly, humbly. It was most certainly by following her example and praying for her intercession that I was gently lead on the path with and closer to Christ--St. Therese was my reliable and faithful, loving and gentle friend.
Before leaving on mission, I ran into little hints every which way I turned, introducing me to another Carmelite saint, doctor of the Church, and extraordinary woman that even St. Therese referred to as "Mother"--St. Teresa of Avila. I had no idea why, but I was drawn to learn more about her. I think it is no coincidence that as my interest in getting to know better the life and soul of St. Teresa, the Spanish mystic, reformer of the Carmelite order and founder of the Discalced Carmelites, began to take root, I moved here to Vienna to help open a new home for Heart's Home (Teresa traveled all over Spain on some rather perilous and grueling journeys and often encountering cruel opposition, especially from the parishes, in order to establish the reformed Carmelites), which is in the parish of Karmeliterkirche (the Church of an old Carmelite community) and where, upon the front right side of the Church stands a statue of St. Theresa amidst the transverberation of her heart (an experience of religious ecstasy).
I saw in his hand a long spear of gold, and at the iron's point there seemed to be a little fire. He appeared to me to be thrusting it at times into my heart, and to pierce my very entrails; when he drew it out, he seemed to draw them out also, and to leave me all on fire with a great love of God. The pain was so great, that it made me moan; and yet so surpassing was the sweetness of this excessive pain, that I could not wish to be rid of it. The soul is satisfied now with nothing less than God. The pain is not bodily, but spiritual; though the body has its share in it. It is a caressing of love so sweet which now takes place between the soul and God, that I pray God of His goodness to make him experience it who may think that I am lying. (The Life of Teresa of Jesus)
I began reading her works, starting with her autobiography which I am still working on. In her writings, insights, accounts of the daily events of her life which were at times exuberant and at times unbearable, there lies a most lively and inspiring model of courage. I think that above all is truly a gift of the saints to us, especially through the writings they leave behind...they give us courage, they urge us on, they make us realize that we are not living this life alone, that we are not the first or only ones to experience distress, that there is nothing to fear and there is hope to be had if only we will trust a little more everyday.
...just to give you a little taste, the following are some wonderful quotes from the biography of St. Teresa that I have already finished...
"She was not allowed to withdraw from the world and devote herself to her inner life; she was to travel an even harder path where contemplation and action are one."
"One of the most remarkable strands of Teresa's mysticism is the extent to which she was, like many true contemplatives, both Martha and Mary, both active and passive. Her mysticism did not divorce her from outward reality, rather it took her deeper into the world."
on right intention and detachment//
"Once while thinking of how much more purely one lives when withdrawn from business affairs and how when I am involved in them I make poor progress and commit many faults, I heard: 'It cannot be helped, daughter; strive to have the right intentions and to be detached in all things, and look at Me so that what you do might be done in conformity with what I did.' "
surrender and joy in God//
"One day while I was anxiously desiring to help the order, the Lord told me: 'Do what lies in your power; surrender yourself to me, and do not be disturbed about anything; rejoice in the good that has been given you, for it is very great, my Father takes His delight in you, and the Holy Spirit loves you."
on friendship//
"In Teresa's teaching, friendship ought never be excessive, but should express itself by taking on household tasks, thus sparing other, by the prayerful and speedy settling of differences, by rejoicing in the virtue of others and tolerating their faults."
"There is nothing, however annoying, that cannot easily by borne by those who love each other."
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